If you are thinking this is what I want for mother’s day it is not because this is how
my day starts almost every morning. Honest! It is perfect and I feel like it is
mother’s day every morning.
Yesterday morning was no different. The child gave me a
beautiful book he made in school, with the help of his wonderful teacher, Ms.
H, in which he wrote that his mother works on a computer, weighs 30lbs and is a siantist (scientist).
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Three years younger too!
The
spouse, who has turned vegetarian since my last post, bought me my favorite
kababs and biryani on the way back from the temple. Evening was a simple but
delicious vegetable sandwich made with crusty bread and layered and stuffed
with kale butter, guacamole, cucumbers, onions and tomatoes. I took a long
shower and nobody raised an eyebrow or interrupted to ask me where the pepper
mill was. It was a blissful, relaxing day
followed by another outstanding episode of Sherlock on PBS Masterpiece.
You may ask then, what more could I want for mother’s day. And
I will tell you what more I want on mother’s day or any other day of the year. The only reason I write this is because I read some posts on mother’s day which were about how grateful and thankful the moms
were for their kids and husband horsing around, debating and talking loudly in
the kitchen, and how that is enough for them. Which is all fine and dandy but no mother is happy all the time with what goes on with her kids and her house. So, just to set the record straight, I will not sugar coat what I want for
mother’s day or any other day of the year. My list is not too long and I don’t
think what I want is too much. Raise your hand if you agree.
1.
For once, it would be nice if my kid cleaned up
his toys and put them away before going to bed so I don’t have to stumble on
them in the dark. It would be even nicer
if I didn’t have to remind him to clean up his toys for the hundredth time
before he eventually “cleaned” the mess by shoving it all under the table or
stuffing the whole lot in a big box and calling it “chore done”. (He did help
me vacuum the carpet yesterday.)
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2.
It would be nice not to have to pick up
discarded T-shirts, shorts and undershirts from the living room couch, side
tables and from the bottom of the bed. I don’t care if the bed is not made up perfectly, with
hospital corners and such, but please can we all just pick up our discarded
clothes and put them in the laundry basket.
3.
I would NOT like to be surprised on mother’s day
or any other day, with flowers because the frugal desi in me balks at the
exorbitant rate of flowers and how quickly they wilt and find their way to the
compost bin or the trash can. My kind of
surprise would be to wake up to find a clean home, or to come home after
spending two months in India to find the yard has been landscaped or the bedroom has been painted. In the interest of full disclosure, I am going to India
soon and will be gone for two months.
4.
I am a sucker for meaningful gestures and every
time he brings back a piece of cake, an interesting sandwich or salad from his
cafeteria because he thinks I might like it, I am a happy woman. So, for mother’s
day or any other day of the year, I would like for these simple gestures to
continue.
5.
The last thing I want for mother’s day or any
other day of the year is to not find empty milk cartons, empty berry containers
and empty cereal boxes in the fridge and pantry respectively.
Also, before you wonder, yes, I am grateful
and thankful for the wonderful boy and the amazing man who enrich my life every
day by acts of thoughtfulness and kindness.
But I would still want them to do one or all of the above, if not every day of the year, then at least on mother's day.
How was your mother’s day like and what would you really want on mother's day?
Me too! I'm super kanjoos and keep thinking of the house cleaning bit. It gives me peace of mind. Acc to A, if I don't empty the fridge by the end of the weekend, it keeps troubling me :D
ReplyDeleteHere, T is the one who is troubled by the contents of the fridge at the end of the week. Of course, I am the one who gets to clean it because I don't want him to throw away perfectly good food. I don't mind cleaning the kitchen and dishes and the fridge. :D
DeleteOh i loved this post. Oh i do agree with you about everything. But then now my daughter is not staying with us I do miss all the things which you mentioned which you ahve to do, does tha tmake sense as I used to moan aobut it every time, clean your room, clean up after taking a bath or shower etc............... oh yes I am frugal when it comes to flower i am liek why spend dso much money when it dies in a week or so :-) said that i had a wonderful mothers day :-)with presents from S, but still had to cook lunch thougg :-)
ReplyDeleteFinala, may be I will miss the messy house when he grows up or may be I will never have a clean house. I don't know. Right now, the idea of a clean house sounds good though. :-)
DeleteDid S pamper you with 5 Star chocolate bars?
No 5 stars as we don't get it here :-( she gave me cookbook :-)
Deletevery true..i dream of a spic and span house when I wake up ..that never happens..and what I needed the most when asked during this mothers day was a good sleep for atleast three continuous hours..(my 2 months old manages to keep me awake throughtout the night and the five year old during the day!!)
ReplyDeleteSowmya, I hope you got the three hour nap you needed.
DeleteAmen to all of the above and my hands are raised! :-D!
ReplyDeleteThanks for posting an honest mother's day note. Many of us write with the same tonal notes on food blogs.
The saintist one was good! :-D!
Shri, thank you for validating. :-)
DeleteI almost did a dounle take on the saintist, because the first time I read it as satanist. :-)
As a guy who is quite "unhandy", its the landscaping and painting the bedroom part that bothers me. If my wife wanted this and I got it professionally done before she returns from an extended vacation, would that count? Or do you ladies count the calluses on our palms and the streaks of paint in our (now receding) hairlines?
ReplyDeleteAs the wife of a wonderful but quite "unhandy" guy, I give the the professionally done work bonus points. And yes, the callues on his palms and the streaks of paint in his (not receding) hairline definitely count for a whole lot more. :-)
Delete:) what I love the most is that you are the last to wake up? Wk days too??! It never ever happens to me and I hate waking up in the morning. (and still do even on wkends..how sad is that- tho on wkends the kids will wake up earlier than we want them too).
ReplyDeleteditto on all the others.. don't care for a bundle of rose.. but a pretty backyard corner will do.. or even a pot of plant which will grow for ever. I do not care for a fancy spa and come back to see a house gone wrong while I am away. I would rather wake up to the chores done..
Perfect! and after all the hand made cards (and I got more than I could hold with "M for Monster" (with lots of apologies and kisses to make up for that) in one place just becoz she could not think of good words starting with all the letters of Mommy or Soma, and she wanted it to be a secret card .. LOL) are the most precious..and the imperfections makes them the best.
lovely post.
Soma, weekdays and weekends. Really. Will send you a mail explaining why. :-)
DeleteOh the M for Monster is so precious and hilarious. Keep it forever and show it to her when she is older. :-)
I raise both hands and nod in agreement.
ReplyDeleteJust last night, I woke up with a terrible migraine that threatened to blow my head to tiny bits, I managed to stumble my way into the kitchen for a painkiller, on the way stepped on a tiny McQueen car, cursed freely...
I want little things that will make my life a tiny bit easier, more relaxed.
Hope your trip to India is all things good, fun, food and relaxation!
Manasi, I have been there. Oh those little cars and trucks drive me nuts.
DeleteBTW, a little birdie tells me you live in DFW too. It is always good to know a fellow blogger who lives in the same city.
You were inspired, Jaya the Satanist! I loved that book and that his teacher did not correct his spelling.
ReplyDeleteMy Mother's Day was no different from any other Sunday. That's what I liked about it the most. Unlike you though, I was the only one up and about until past noon. They each had their reasons for sleeping in and I didn't grudge them that. When they woke up, each asked what I would like for brunch and I said what I would like most was if they made themselves whatever they wanted. They did. No flowers. No gifts. We're not a gifting family. Medha helped me put plant some saplings and then off we went to the mall to look for a graduation dress. She tried desperately to get her father to go get me flowers because I do like flowers - some of them last a good 2 weeks and I like the splash of color in the house - but he declined as he believes that flowers must reside on the parent bush but he told her that he would do something that would please me even more. I knew and was mighty thrilled to not have to unload and then load the dishwasher, a task I had been putting off all day. *I* cooked dinner, after which we watched a one of *her* TV shows and folded clothes together.
Although the attention is nice, I do have a list, not very different from yours that I would like, not just for Mother's Day but EVERY Day. Help with chores and picking up after yourself are included but most of all, I would like to say goodbye to the teenage attitude. We talk about it all the time and she's sorry until the next time, which could be anywhere from half hour to a few days later. That's really what I want and not just for Mother's Day but for every day. She didn't ask me again what I wanted for Mother's Day although she did apologize and promised to keep trying. Like she has many times before. I believe her each time because I know she suffers as much as I do when those words just tumble out of her mouth. I've been there so I know but that doesn't make it ok. The clutter is much easier to put away; not so much this.
Are you sure you want your rooms painted and your yard landscaped before you come back? I would need to have a say in the colors and in the design of my yard.
Oh Manisha, I remember my teenage days all too well and even now when I in India with my mom, I say and do things I regret almost immediately. But they happen nevertheless. It is a complicated relationship we have with mothers/ daughters.
DeleteI wouldn't mind the rooms painted or the yard landscaped because the decision would be made before I left. All he would have to do is supervise the landscaping or paint the colors I chose. :-)
On Saturday, the husband and daughter had gone out and they came back with a bunch of flowers. I assumed it was for Mother's Day and was oh so pleased. My frugal desi is silent in Jo'burg coz the flowers here are ridiculously cheap and I love having a splash of colour in the house. Turns out the flowers weren't for Mother's Day but because they were cheap and beautiful :)
ReplyDeleteI am not complaining because we really aren't the family makes a big deal of any days other than birthdays.
That said, I have, of course, written Mother's Day (the one I mailed you) and Valentine's Day wish lists that I regularly remind the husband and daughter of.
Aqua, the frugal desi in me wouldn't mind cheap flowers either. T's friend here has spent as much as $70 on mother's day flowers! To me that is a bit too much.
DeleteI loved your mother's day list. Hope the husband and daughter remember some of it next year. :-)
I agree on the Flower gifting part. I would rather take something else. That book is super cute. S had made something like that in pre-school too and my weight was 30 and age 18. Ah bliss !
ReplyDeleteThough I am not a sucker for days like V-day and Frnship Day, I somehow love Mother's Day ;-) Not a whole lot different as the husband makes the weekend breakfast anyhow but I like the global hype over it :-D
Jaya, so good to see your post after a long time. Ditto your thoughts on 1) 2) and 3) and 5). Regarding 5) in my ase it is only going to be a wishful thinking :-(
ReplyDelete:) such a cute post,,
ReplyDeleteJust saw this...and loved it. Just like your book; mine says that I am 4yrs. old (I wish); and am a "cooker"- because "you're always cooking"!! My being a "siantist" was totally overlooked.....Although my everyday wish list would look pretty much like yours; I have to say that my Mother's Day wish would be to wake up to the smell of adrak wali chai and the sight of A straining it :-))
ReplyDeleteHi, I'm a new reader. Love your honest post and rotfl that your son noted your weight as 30 lbs!! How lovely!! In our house, we just don't celebrate Mother's day, Valentine's day, Father's day, the-day-I-got-my ears-pierced day etc! I would much rather have the small treats you talk about each day of the year than a huge diamond pendant on that one day!
ReplyDelete